Love Does Not Envy
Envy. Envy is a negative word. It's related to words like jealousy, resentment, and lust. While the other words may have some degree of justification in some contexts (Except lust. Lust is pretty bad in all contexts), envy is unanimously bad. I was a child not too long ago and I remember vividly the destructive influence of envy. My New Bible Dictionary identifies envy as: “A grudging regard for the advantages seen to be enjoyed by others” (McDonald 325). I sincerely can not think of a more concise definition of that word. Let me break that down for you.
Envy is a type of feeling that has direction to it. The word is always pointed at something or someone. Envy is the emotion of a person in relation to what that person perceives in other people. Whether that’s belongings, relationships, jobs, or anything else, the person experiencing envy will hate that someone else has something. What a destructive emotion. Envy often manifests as sarcasm and gossip, but always as a matter of perspective. Envy is a subjective experience. Notice that envy isn’t focused on the good of the object or thing the other person has, it’s really about selfishness.
Think of a little boy who has a chest full of toys. The boy plays with his blocks and builds a castle. His little sister comes by and asks to play, but the little boy refuses, saying he doesn’t want to share his blocks. The younger sister shrugs and takes a toy truck from the toy chest. Then the little boy cries out, “No you can’t have that, I want to play with it,” leaving his blocks behind.
This story is all too familiar. Every parent knows that children don’t need to be taught selfishness. We are all bent towards wickedness, even if we are not entirely evil. Envy is an even further twisting of a selfish heart. While a selfish child may simply not want to share his toys, an envious child will hate that other children have toys that he or she doesn’t. In some extreme cases envy will be so strong that it doesn’t matter that we have what others have--instead the envy distorts our relationship to how others enjoy life itself. Everything that brings joy to that person dissatisfies us, making us resentful that they get to even have it.
A general enviousness such as this (where the envy is directed at anyone and everything) is very rare, and is usually the unnatural result of allowing sin to grow in a person since youth with no correction. Instead it is much more common (and more acceptable) to harbor specified and tamed envy. Often we call this pettiness, where we can aim it at some specific person or persons we don’t like or agree with. Even the word, ‘petty’ is considerably less noxious sounding than ‘envy.’ But make no mistake, this is the same attitude. When we are envious of or petty towards others, we create an allowance for that same distortion inherited at childhood to continue. This is not love
The Bible teaches us that love does not envy. I am hopeful that you can see today that envy is a relational disease. It contaminates our perception of our fellow man. Envy believes that I am deserving while reinforcing that belief by lessening the value of those around us. I encourage you, dear reader, to consider the words in Philippians 2:3 that encourage an opposite reaction to the good of others. Let us think more of others and not less. Let us seek their good, rather than our own good. Let us love as the Bible teaches.
Love does not envy
-pastor eli
McDonald, H. D. “Envy.” New Bible Dictionary, edited by D. R. W. Wood et al., 3rd ed., InterVarsity Press, 1996, p. 325.